


I've Been Expecting You

by orphan_account



Category: Frozen (2013)
Genre: And Hans was the good guy, Don't Examine This Too Closely, F/M, Now you know, What if Elsa was the Villain, it's pretty crappy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-17
Updated: 2015-09-17
Packaged: 2018-04-21 06:59:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4819607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In an attempt to save his true love from the clutches of her wicked Ice Queen sister, Hans of the Southern Isles ventures deep into the very heart of his enemy's territory...and power.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I've Been Expecting You

**Author's Note:**

> Okay yeah, this is nothing short of evil, so, uh, You Have Been Warned...?

She was beautiful, of course. Intense, blue eyes; flawless, porcelain skin; champagne blond hair, braided elegantly with crystal snowflakes. She was a picture of beauty and grace, decorum and power - so much power. Even her dress, blue and flattering, made of ice itself, added to this. If he hadn't known better, he might have thought she was benign. But he _did_ know better. The glint in her eyes was hungry and wild; only the barest hint to her true nature. She was not benign. She was not kind. She was as cold and hard and unforgiving as the ice she commanded, and the tundra she surrounded herself with.

Her sister had forced an outburst, revealed her to her people, and they had called her a monster. She had taken less than kindly to the brand, and, in revenge, she had captured her sister - their beloved princess - and taken her to her home. It was her palace, but it was to be her sister's prison, and very possibly her grave. Somewhere in this glittering, beautiful and deadly fortress was Princess Anna, and she was slowly freezing to death. And only _he_ could prevent that from happening. Prince Hans of the Southern Isles, youngest of thirteen brothers but no less noble for it. Kind and true and a worthy companion to the princess, many would assure. But He was not here to be a prince, he was here to be a diplomat, a hero, and - should things come to it - a soldier. Or an executioner.

The journey to this magnificent structure had been long and arduous - needless to say it had also been cold. He couldn't say if it was due to magic or exhaustion or fear or a combination of the three, but it was the sort of cold that sunk deep into his bones and rested there; like he could never, _would_ never be warm again. Even under his many layers of clothing; rich and thick, he was shivering. But for the sake of remaining in at least a modicum of a position of power, he had to stand firm, and force the shivers still. He already had little to bargain, he was not about to give her another upper hand.

But despite all of this, he had had some small luck, encountering an ice salesman by the name of Kristoff along the way. He was grumpy, but he was strong, and knew these mountains better than most. He had seen the palace first appear a few weeks ago; and had found it nothing short of stunning. But even then he had felt the negative aura that surrounded it, and had not dared venture near. He had been apprehensive even when Hans had told him of the rescue mission he had put in place for the Princess.

Now, he was stood beside him, a few paces behind, though, staring at her as though she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. In all honesty, Hans thought, she probably was. She was objectively stunning, and Kristoff didn't seem the type to get out much and mingle with women. Moreover, he knew she was responsible for this masterpiece of frozen architecture. Evil or not, one had to admire the simple beauty of this place. But as beautiful as it was, is was still a prison. And Anna was still fading any inside it's icy depths.

Elsa, sat on her ice throne, an elegant and dainty ice-crown of her own design atop her head, regarded him. Her hands were casual and relaxed on the arms of the throne, and glinting in the corner, tossed away carelessly, was the simple tiara that had crowned her the night she had run away. Exactly two weeks before she had returned to capture her own sister. Well, she herself hadn't returned. No, she had sent great ice giants; beasts of pure snow, with hearts as cold as their bodies. They bore no sympathy for even the smallest child, and had barged their way through the town until they had reached Anna, seeming to have little interest in anyone else, but not hesitated to throw aside the few brave enough who tried (in vain) to stop them. Hans knew she didn't want Arendelle; she never had. No, she never intended to return there, she just wanted revenge on Anna. She would probably leave the kingdom alone, but that was not enough for Hans. Anna was still a life to save, moreover the life he loved.

Elsa smiled down at him, her expression as cold as the ice she commanded.

"Prince Hans..." She purred, her voice oddly warm, but with a distinct and dangerous edge, "I've been expecting you." The Prince of the Southern Isles swallowed, forcing his shivering to stop, and gathering his scattered courage. He bowed, elbowing Kristoff who, dazed by the magnificence of his surroundings, was not entirely following the conversation, too busy gazing up at the ice. Quickly, he, too shuffled into a low bow.

Still bowing low, still looking at the floor which made the ice, staring a blueish relfection, Hans swallowed again. His face was pale and his features were pinched with cold and exhaustion. His eyes looked oddly bright - or was that just the sparkle of the ice? - and there were dark circles underneath them. He looked ill. "P-Princess Elsa-" He began, but she cut him off coldly.  
  
"Queen." She corrected him, the purr from before gone, replaced with unforgiving steel, "Remember your manners, _Prince Hans_. I was crowned _before_ I left Arendelle. I am, by all their laws, their Queen and ruler." She paused, then smiled, but it was not pleasant, and it did not reach her eyes, "And wouldn't you agree it fit to call myself the queen of the snow, also?" Hans, realising after a moment it wasn't rhetorical, nodded hurriedly. Elsa's catlike smirk twitched to become bigger by the smallest of fractions, and then her eyes darted to the side, where Kristoff, nervously twisting his dark woollen hat between his gloved hands, was still gaping up at the intricate structure of the palace.

"Who is your...friend?" She asked, her tone light but obviously deceptive. Hans made a small noise in the back of his throat, and succeeded in tearing Kristoff's attention away from the palace. He glanced at Hans, then to Elsa, and his eyes widened. He quickly stepped forwards and gave another bow.

"My name is Kristoff, Your Highness." He replied, "Kristoff Bjorgman. I..." He paused and blushed - well, blushed _more_. His cheeks were already flushed from the cold air. "I-I'm an ice salesman." Elsa seemed to like that. She smiled and leant back a little in her throne, resting her pointed chin daintily on the knuckles of a small, pale hand.

"Oh really?" She mused, "Well, as an ice salesman, you probably know good ice when you see it." She moved her hand from under her chin and gestured loosely but gracefully to the palace around them, "What would say of mine?"  


"It's amazing. _Wonderful_." He replied eagerly; as though he were talking to a friend and not the Ice-Queen-of-Evil. Hans wasn't sure if Kristoff was gushing out of nervousness, genuine appreciation or a well-hidden cunning, but his expression flattened nonetheless. "And your palace..." Kristoff continued, "This has to be the most beautiful ice I've ever seen, simply incredible..." He trailed off, awed.  


Elsa gave another small smile at that. Hans decided at that point upon _well-hidden cunning_. "Thank you, Mr  Bjorgman." She said gracefully, and when she smiled it seemed almost genuine. "I'm pleased you think so. There are few people have appreciation for the finer aspects of the winter." She threw a glare in Hans' direction. "Like the people of my so-called _home_." She said, in a tone that was nothing like her earlier purr of appreciation. "Who shunned me and called me a witch and a monster for what I could do. But look,around you. Look at the beauty I am capable of. Does this look like the work of a witch or a monster to you?"

_ Yes_ , Hans thought silently, though he dared not say it. _But even a monster can make beautiful things, and they are the most dangerous of all._  


"Nonetheless," Elsa continued, "You at least had the foresight to bring someone of a better opinion with you." She looked to Kristoff again and smiled. Kristoff smiled back and bowed to her, and when he straightened he shot a look to Hans. It now seemed very likely that his compliments had had two intentions; now Elsa was in a better mood; even the icy throne room felt marginally warmer. Marginally.

"Queen Elsa," Hans then said, stepping forwards, "I was wondering if..."

"Ah, yes." She murmured, voice clipped, "I had a feeling you would ask something of me. And I think I know _what_. of course, you think asking will change my mind. It won't, but I'll do you the courtesy, anyway. Which brings me to my question: why are you here?"  
  
There was a long, dangerous pause. "Well...Anna." Hans answered after a moment, "I want to bring her home to Arendelle, safely."

Elsa's face hardened like so much water freezing. "No." She said bluntly.

"But you _have_ to let her go!" Hans exclaimed, "She's your sister!"

"You of all people should know that _blood_ does not automatically equate to obligations!" Elsa snapped, and Hans glared up at her. She had crossed the line, but he wasn't about to let her know how much that stung. Everyone knew the story of the Thirteenth Son of the Southern Isles. Overlooked by his father, unloved by his mother, teased and tortured and ignored by his brothers. Part of the reason he had come to Arendelle was to forge a new life for himself, ideally as an assistant to the young and inexperienced ruler of the port town, that had closed its gates for so long that it might need some help in relearning the ways of trade.

"She forced me out." Elsa continued, "My own people shunned me. Forced me to live in solitude, because they cannot comprehend my power, and for that they condemn me." her voice was grinding with anger; a flint against stone. "They forced me, their Queen, to choose between freedom and exile. So now I have stolen their heir." The ice palace shook a little; like it might collapse underneath them, and some cracks appeared in the clear walls. Kristoff frowned at the marred beauty of what could well become their tomb.

"But Elsa," Hans pleaded, growing desperate - for every minute he spent arguing with her was another minute Anna spent freezing to death. "Anna is your sister. Don't you love her?"

"Of course I love her." Elsa snarled, and her anger seemed to be more at the accusation than anything else; as though she was insulted by the prospect of not loving her sister, despite everything she had done, and everything she thought Anna had done. "But I love her for the girl she was, not the woman she grew to be." There was a long pause, and a thousand emotions seemed to flicker in Elsa's eyes before she spoke again. She seemed to be collecting herself; calming herself, and her emotionless mask returned to rest upon her pretty face. "And for that reason," She said carefully, "I will offer you a chance. _One_ chance. Consider that in itself a gift, Prince Hans of the Southern Isles. If you can find Anna and leave my palace, I will not attempt to capture ether of you again, and I will allow you to leave with your life."

"But only this time." She continued, "By releasing her she will surely be crowned, and I will have no right to Arendelle." No matter, she didn't care for it anyway; not anymore. "But the mountains remain mine. And if you or anyone from Arendelle comes to my palace, they will be in my domain and I may do as I please. This is your only warning."

"Thank you, Queen Elsa." Hans said, bowing, and shivering, but now with relief rather than cold. However, he was not done yet - though apparently, neither was Elsa.

"I was not finished." She said, a bit of a snap creeping into her voice. "I am giving you a chance to rescue my sister from this place. But you must _buy_ your chance to rescue my sister back. There is a price."

"A price? And what might that be?" He had no doubt in his mind that it was his own life, but then Elsa proved him wrong.

"Your companion." She said, looking at Kristoff. "He is the first person to appreciate what I am capable of. I rather like him." Kristoff smiled nervously; but whether it was because a woman was expressing interest in him, or because an _evil_ woman was expressing interest in him, Hans couldn't tell. "In return for his remaining here," Elsa continued, "You may have your chance to save my sister from her prison. If you succeed, you are free to leave with her and return to Arendelle, never to enter my territory again." They all knew what her territory was; everything north of the Southern Mountain(that is, the most southern mountain in the land that still had snow on its peak year-round).

"And if I fail to save Anna?" Hans asked, though this time he was sure he knew the answer.

"You share her fate." Elsa said carelessly, "You will both freeze to death, and you will share a grave instead of a life." Swallowing at the rather stark imagery, Hans nodded grimly; he had thought as much. He turned to Kristoff. His friend, his companion, if only for these few short days. Kristoff's face was a slight frown, of confusion and scrutiny as he tried to work out what was going on in Hans' head just as much as Hans was trying to work out what was going on in his. After a long moment, Hans sighed heavily, and turned forlornly to Elsa.

"I cannot accept your offer, Queen Elsa. as much as I care for your sister, Kristoff's life is not mine to give. I will not sell him like coal."

Kristoff frowned indignantly, "Hey, I have a choice here, too." He pointed out, and he looked to Elsa, "I'll stay here." He shrugged, as though it was really no big deal, "I've been around ice my whole life. I like it, and I don't mind the cold, either."After a moment, Elsa nodded, accepting the deal. Internally, Hans let out a heavy breath of relief, but he was still apprehensive to leave Kristoff behind. However, the blonde man, with the ice in his hair and the determined set of his jaw turned back to Hans, evidently not quite finished. "Go save your one true love, or whatever." He said. His family were always telling him about true love, and for the most part, his true love was ice. But he knew enough to see that what Hans and Anna had was the true love that was always being talked about. And though he would never admit it, he was kind of rooting for them.

Plus he got to live in an ice palace. There were worse fates. Hans nodded to Kristoff in thanks, and that was that; the agreement was made. Hans bowed to Elsa, and she smiled at him, but it was cold and unforgiving. Whatever interest or strange, twisted thing she might call love she held for Kristoff, she did not hold for _him_ in the slightest. "Good luck, Prince of the Southern Isles." She said, her voice catlike and icy, "But remember, you only have the one chance, and it is rather a long fall to where my sister's cell."

"Wha-" Hans never finished his question. The ice beneath his feet opened up like a sinkhole and he fell seamlessly down into the ice palace. Sure, he ended up in Anna's cell, but even if he survived the fall, there was still the cold to worry about. And the question of whether Anna was still alive, too. Elsa hadn't bothered to check.

 _Idiot prince._ She thought savagely, _to risk all that on love. Yes, I gave him an opportunity to try and save her, but_ _he will **die** trying. _ Had anyone been privy to her thoughts, they might have thought her mad, but no one was. No one except a gruff, blonde, ice salesman, with brown eyes and frozen golden hair, smiling up at her with a warm expression and all the love he could bear. Elsa smiled at him as he climbed the steps to her throne and bowed before her again. Laughing, all the coldness from her expression gone, she stood up and wrapped her arms around his neck. Whether or not Hans and Anna made it out alive, they would be left alone; in peace and forever. That was all she wanted. Her ice and her consort.

"A very convincing performance, love." She told him, and Kristoff chuckled, the sound gruff and low.

"It was no performance," He replied, "As if I would have to pretend I found you or your talents anything less than _stunning_." And as he bent down to meet her lips with his own, Hans landed in his ice prison. 

Through some miracle, he had managed to stab his dagger into the side of his tunnel and slow his fall to the point where he didn't die upon impact as he landed in the cell where Anna, only minutes from death, lay. Frozen and injured, she was only barely conscious, and he shuffled over to her, an arm and several ribs broken, and cradled her in his arms as she died. He followed soon after; from cold and injury and simple heartbreak. Meanwhile, Arendelle mourned the loss of its Princess, but ultimately forgot, and thanked that the vicious ice Queen left them alone. All the while Elsa and Kristoff were smiling and laughing high above in the beauty of the ice palace, unbothered by the cold, or the bodies of the two lovers many hundreds of feet below, in the icy bowels of the mountain.

But what can one expect when you mess with an Ice Queen in her own territory? And use her lover as your closest ally? And uptake her on a challenge of her own design? You didn't think this was a **_fairytale_** , did you?


End file.
